Tarquin Alexandra - Intrinsically Liminal
We believe music is for everybody. You’ll find that written on our front page, because it’s true. No matter what your background is, where you come from or what capability you have, everyone should be free to partake in the joy of music.
It’s a wonderful thing that with every passing year, music becomes more accessible than ever before. It still has a long way to go, but small steps like remote recording and video calling have allowed artists like Tarquin Alexandra to make superb work, like her latest EP and single, entitled ‘A Tyrant’s Demise’. Explore this EP with Moths and Giraffes as co-producer Natasha Sophia provides accompanying commentary, with a concluding Q&A from Tarquin.
Image Credit: Tarquin Alexandra.
Canadian singer, songwriter and producer Tarquin Alexandra takes great inspiration from her experiences of chronic and mental illness, channelling them into her music. This begins in earnest with Tarquin’s ‘Pretend’ EP, including its title track which received a self-produced music video, released in 2018. Focusing more on mental illness, Alexandra released ‘Monsters With Moustaches’ in early 2020, a full album with production by Guillermo Subauste.
Tarquin’s exploration of chronic illness in her music is best illustrated in ‘Symptoms Song’, a self-produced track less than a minute long but with so much to say. She later explores the concept of brain fog on her YouTube channel in a track entitled ‘a song about life not feeling real’. Her channel also features renditions of music by Olivia Rodrigo, dodie, Orla Gartland and Greta Isaac.
Co-producer Natasha Sophia.
Continuing through the pandemic, Alexandra teamed up with musician and producer Natasha Sophia to work on her next EP, ‘A Tyrant’s Demise’. A fellow chronic illness sufferer, the two musicians were a perfect match creatively, as Natasha illustrates below:
‘Tarquin asked me to co-produce/I begged to be a part of this project. The whole process of co-writing was really good for us both because as chronically ill individuals, we feel pressured to perform the way able bodied people do and that is really harmful for our health. So we learned a lot about our respective boundaries as we worked on this together.’ – Natasha Sophia
Released in April 2021, the three-track ‘A Tyrant’s Demise’ begins with ‘Limelight (Blue)’.
‘Limelight is the first song on the EP. The most pop-y song. We knew we wanted it to have a good groove to it and one of my favourite things in up tempo songs is body percussion. So I came up with some fun snapping and clapping rhythms that would weave and intertwine with each other and give another layer to the song. Tarquin had a pretty solid idea for instrumentation with this song so it was just a matter of getting the most flushed out sound and getting the elements just right. One thing that was consistent throughout the whole EP is the choir-y backup vocals. I come from a choir background and we knew going into this that we wanted that element to carry throughout the whole project.’ – Natasha Sophia
Opening with vocal harmonies like the sun rising on a brand-new day, ‘Limelight (Blue)’ is driven by percussion and a bass riff, keeping Tarquin’s voice in the centre for the first verse: ‘I'm in the limelight, it's a quarter after two, I'm counter-clockwise, been counting on you.’ The more attention you pay to Alexandra’s voice, the more you realise that every syllable is carefully sounded out and thought through. The consideration Tarquin gives to her lead vocal performances on this EP is like seeing nature in motion.
Tarquin Alexandra’s lead vocal is surrounded across this EP by a multitude of backing vocals too, interacting in a way that isn’t predictable and is exceedingly exciting to experience in headphones. Listen especially for the humming choir in the song’s conclusion. The way Limelight evolves is helped along by the varying keyboard layers, organ and synthesizer patches, with each part of this song key to making it a fantastic listening presentation.
‘Ends Meet was my favourite to work on personally because I had so much fun with writing a bass line for a slower song and creating a full song while still keeping the minimal feel. The backup vocals are a KEY element in this song. Making them hollow and reverb-y was like putting a bow on a perfectly wrapped present. Layering harmonies is something Tarquin and I are both extremely fond of so I was able to have a lot of fun with that.’ – Natasha Sophia
Already in the first few seconds, accompanying Tarquin’s vocal is a layer of ambient noise, the sound of tinkling bottles and an upright bass. With backing vocals comes sparse electric piano, bolstering the notes from Natasha’s bassline. Alexandra’s chorus in ‘Ends Meet’ features some of her best lyrical play on this EP:
‘This friction is fictional, intrinsically liminal, to put in your hands, my breakable stance, well it's easier just to play pretend.’
The pacing of Ends Meet lends itself to more than being a vehicle for Tarquin’s vocal too, creatively increasing in tempo towards the end of the song. The instrumentation and ambience could almost be part of a film soundtrack, and it isn’t impossible that vocal-less versions of these songs could be heard in future. Alexandra has recently released an instrumental version of her debut album ‘Monsters With Moustaches’ on her Bandcamp page, in celebration of its two year anniversary. On Tarquin’s YouTube channel, she shows how Ends Meet originally sounded, played on a baritone ukulele with additional backing vocals.
‘Circling Your Block is the song I had the least to do with. But the choir is many many many vocal stacks of me using different tones so it sounds more like a choir and less like just one person.’ – Natasha Sophia
Beginning with pizzicato strings, ‘Circling Your Block’ has the most grand and soaring arrangement of the three songs on A Tyrant’s Demise. Tarquin and Natasha’s voices are at times indistinguishable from each other, the perfect harmonic blend that makes this song so utterly beautiful. Natural drums help to steady the orchestrations and vocal layers.
The music videos for A Tyrant’s Demise were put together by artist, photographer and illustrator Daegan Lunsford, where he utilises creative commons footage from the Prelinger Archives. This is old footage that has fallen into the public domain and can be reused by anybody, as demonstrated in Lunsford’s edits which are aligned with Tarquin Alexandra’s current preferred visual style.
‘All of the visuals for the EP were just me, my camera, and my shutter release cable. I have so much respect for photographers that do self portraits, they are immensely difficult to do, particularly in a bathtub.’ – Tarquin Alexandra
Alexandra and Sophia later released a production video, explaining more about the making of A Tyrant’s Demise and the challenges they faced due to the unpredictable nature of chronic illness. In the video they also discuss the changes they’d like to see within the industry in order to better accommodate all music lovers. In a final comment for Moths and Giraffes, Natasha sheds more light on their production collaboration:
‘Co-producing this was really fun because I can hear entire orchestrations in my head and communicating them to Tarquin was so easy because I could just make a random and vague noise and she knows exactly what I meant.’ – Natasha Sophia
‘Casualties in waves sound just like my name, tilted like the feral summoned by my tame, amenable demeanour holding by a wire, just in the nick of time.’
Though originally intended for the EP, the title track was ruled out of the final release. Tarquin instead completed it at a later date, releasing the song as a standalone single in April 2022. ‘A Tyrant’s Demise’ is self-produced, written and arranged by Alexandra, with Natasha Sophia contributing the pizzicato strings heard in the song’s bridge.
Producer Guillermo Subauste continues his work with Tarquin on A Tyrant’s Demise, serving as the mix and mastering engineer for this song, as well as the latter for the preceding EP. His separation of the elements in this track particularly highlight how the shifting arrangement beneath Tarquin’s vocal is ever-changing, reforming seamlessly as each line progresses.
Tarquin layers ukulele, percussion and strings to soundtrack her vocal and lyricism, which continues to excel both in the backing vocal layers, and Alexandra’s wordplay. The flow in her melody shaped in the lyrics is exceptional, especially in the chorus:
‘By the light of tomorrow's sky, through the fog of a different time, in the name of a well kept promise, at the stake of a tyrant's demise.’
‘A Tyrant’s Demise’ single artwork by Tarquin Alexandra.
It’s amazing to consider that by working to their own schedules and using modern technology, Tarquin Alexandra and Natasha Sophia have created a gorgeous collection of sounds in these songs. It’s an exciting prospect to consider that if the world were more in tune with the requirements of artists such as these, how much more diverse our musical landscape would be. And how easy it is to accommodate those changes – we just need to provide them.
Continue reading for our Q&A with Tarquin Alexandra, who gives detailed insight into the making and writing of these songs. She discusses the possibility of performing live and what that would require, how her methods of recording changed due to the pandemic and her potential future musical output. Tarquin even allows us to hear how the title track of A Tyrant’s Demise originally sounded in an exclusive. All this and more below!
Image Credit: Tarquin Alexandra.
1. Your latest single, 'A Tyrant's Demise' is the title track of your recent EP, but it was left off of the tracklisting, what led to that decision originally?
A Tyrant’s Demise, the EP, is about falling in love, and what a strange and anxiety-inducing experience it is.
When Natasha Sophia and I were producing the EP, we did it at a fairly slow pace to accommodate for our chronic illness needs. This gave me a lot of time to sit with the songs. There was something that felt wrong about the title track, A Tyrant’s Demise, and I couldn’t figure out what it was, so I ended up cutting it from the EP.
I didn’t intend to release it at all, but between then and now I figured out that I’m on the aromantic spectrum. It made so many of the anxieties that I had written about in the EP make sense, and it felt like a more accurate conclusion to the story than Circling Your Block, which is the final track on the EP.
2. This version has been reworked from its original, what did it sound like before? Will fans ever hear the original?
Yes, it was mostly the lyrics, though, I’ve found an old demo of what the song used to be like. It’s unmixed, and it was intended for only me to hear, but if you would like to hear it I have a convenient SoundCloud link to the demo!
3. The EP wouldn't have been possible without the involvement of Natasha Sophia. How did you first meet Natasha and when did you decide you wanted them to co-write and co-produce the tracks?
How Natasha and I met is actually a funny story.
Despite my strong hesitation, it was recommended to me by everyone and their mother that I perform live – this was pre-pandemic of course, thankfully I’ve stopped getting such unsolicited recommendations. I didn’t feel comfortable performing by myself – my background is in theatre, I’m much more comfortable with the structure of a stage show with a big cast – so as a compromise, I decided that if I could get a band together, then I would try out some open mics.
I tried a few different ways to advertise for band members and I eventually landed on, of all things, Tinder. Now I know that this isn’t the… traditional route… but it worked! I was looking for a guitar player, and two backup singers. Natasha was one of the backup singers that responded. The band idea ended up falling through, but Natasha and I became tremendously good friends, and we’ll now often refer to this as some kind of manifestation of fate.
So really, I suppose I must thank all the unsolicited-advice-givers because they led me to my actual real life soulmate.
It was an easy decision for Natasha to be a part of the project. Since we met, we had always been working together on some music project or another. They would come over for long periods of time during the summer of 2020 and we would quarantine together and write songs. Natasha had expressed at some point that they wanted to learn to produce, and in a moment of excitement, we had the idea that they could produce on my next project.
In many ways this project (and my life) wouldn’t be the same without Natasha. Their involvement in the production and arrangement of the music hugely shaped what the EP is today. They’ve also really encouraged me to lean into sounds and music styles that I love but I’d previously been too scared to explore.
The song, A Tyrant’s Demise, is about falling in a different kind of love than what’s in all the other songs. This representation of traditional romantic love is great and valuable, of course, but I wrote this song to explore a deeper understanding of love that comes when we understand it without romance.
When I say this project wouldn’t be the same without Natasha, I mean it in a lot of ways. Music can surprise you, and sometimes you think you’re writing about one thing when your song is actually about something else. I didn’t realize this when I first wrote it, but the song “A Tyrant’s Demise” was always actually about Natasha.
4. What was the division of labour between yourself and Natasha when making the EP?
We produced this EP at a time that we were both learning a lot about chronic illness, disability, and our own diagnoses. When we started working on it, we decided that we were going to figure out a new way to make music that suited our disabilities and our needs.
After planning out the production ideas for each song, we took it one song at a time, and for each song, we took it one draft at a time, going back and forth with notes and ideas. We’d set flexible deadlines for each draft and had more of a goal for when we wanted the project to be done than a hard deadline.
Even now we’re still adjusting how we work together as our needs change, and as we better understand our disabilities and how they affect our lives.
5. How did the pandemic change your way of working? How did you make a record prior to Covid-19?
My debut album Monsters With Moustaches was recorded in a studio with a producer. I was figuring out my sound, and how to record music, and I felt completely overwhelmed by the prospect of making an entire album. I had prior experience with self-producing music after having done so for my first EP Pretend, but felt like I needed some guidance for such a big project. So I did some research and connected with Guillermo Subauste, who is an incredibly talented musician and producer, and we made Monsters With Moustaches together!
I mentioned before that Natasha and I had been learning about chronic illness, and figuring out more accessible and sustainable ways to make music. I think COVID really solidified that we needed to rewrite the rulebook if we were going to be able to keep doing this. I can’t speak for Natasha, but for me, when everything shut down, I felt like I had permission, for the first time, to fully exist in a way that wasn’t constantly pushing my body past its limits.
This is not to dismiss the severity of this pandemic, particularly for the disabled community. I have been very lucky to be able to stay home, and have the time and resources to make music. Many people don’t have that privilege.
6. The wordplay in the chorus of 'Ends Meet' is excellent, did you get tongue-tied when laying those vocals down? Was it possible to record your vocals for a song in one session?
Thank you, I’m really glad you like it! I played around with the phrasing a lot to make sure that it was exactly what I wanted to say.
Actually, I record things over a long-ish period of time, I take a lot of rests, and I do a lot of takes (the beauty of at-home recording), so I couldn’t possibly recall how many different days and takes any of the vocals on the EP are composed of, but I can confirm that it was NOT in one session!
7. I love all the choir arrangements particularly on 'Circling Your Block', is that all software?
Thank you! All the choir and backup vocals on Circling Your Block are Natasha's composition and performance!
There are software strings and pads and various other sounds that fill out certain sections, but about 80-90% of the background vocals on the whole EP are written and performed by Natasha. I really admire them so much.
8. Daegan Lunsford has created great visuals for the EP, is one coming for the title track too?
Daegan is so talented, I’m really excited that we got to work together on this! He took creative commons footage and made music videos for all of the songs on the EP. I love the idea of creating new stories from old footage, and I think he’s done a brilliant job.
We don’t currently have anything in the works for the title track, but that would be great! I suppose I’ll have to talk to him about that. I really let him take full creative lead on these videos. I would be really curious to find out what he would come up with.
I’m hoping to work with Daegan on my next big project too, but that won’t be for a while, I need to produce the songs first!
9. Your YouTube channel has a variety of covers from Greta Isaac to dodie, Taylor Swift and Orla Gartland. If you were to choose a cover to put together this week, what would you choose and why?
If I had unlimited resources and time, a cover that I’ve always wanted to do is Musician, Please Take Heed from the movie musical God Help The Girl!
God Help The Girl is my favourite movie in the entire universe. It was written and directed by Stuart Murdoch from Belle and Sebastian, and he also wrote all the music. It’s a masterpiece in every way, it’s the embodiment of all my emotions. It’s the perfect piece of art. My greatest wish in life is to have the soundtrack on vinyl. It’s not in print anymore but once the pandemic is over I will be scouring every vinyl store on planet earth to find it.
10. When fans sign up to your mailing list, they sometimes get to hear unreleased music. What was the latest track you sent out this way? Would you tell us more about that song?
Well, actually, the latest track I sent to my email list was A Tyrant’s Demise in December of 2021. I had been sending out an unreleased demo, or voice memo every month of 2021 to kickstart the email list. I wanted to end on a really special note before I switched gears and stopped sending emails so frequently.
During that time, I sent a few demos from my next project called Contortionist (or The Contortionist, I’m undecided on the title). I really love putting out exclusive music to my email list, but it takes a lot of work. When you have limited energy to work with you have to make sacrifices, and for the next little while I think I’m going to slow down a little bit on email and YouTube content to focus on producing this album.
11. Where chronic illness is concerned, is there a way you envisage performing your music live? Is that something you'd want to explore?
I’m so excited about this question. This is something that I think about a lot.
I see so often that accessibility is viewed as a box to be checked only ever out of necessity or legal requirement. That couldn’t be farther from the way I see it. I feel that people should get excited and put creative energy into creating accessible spaces and experiences, the same way they get excited about creating everything else that humans create. I think about how branding and marketing could be such a drag, but so many artists have taken it on as an extension of the art itself and it allows the art to be seen by a bigger audience. Accessibility can and should be the same.
Live music is something that’s hugely inaccessible for so many reasons. For me, as an audience member, I can’t share a space with people that are wearing fragrances, and I can’t stand up for long periods of time. One day I would find it so liberating to be able to use a wheelchair for things like this, but so many venues are not wheelchair accessible. Being crowded in with a lot of people can also be really overwhelming and overstimulating, not to mention the expectation to dance and move your body, which is expending energy that I don’t always have.
There are a lot of ways that live performances can be made accessible for all audiences. Some common ways that some shows are already doing this are sign language interpreted performances, captioned performances, audio described performances, touch tours, and relaxed performances, to list a few. It’s also remarkably easy to not use flashing lights, which instantly places limits on who can attend. I know that it’s not always possible to get your ideal choice of venue when you’re an artist booking a tour, but prioritizing accessible venues that have seating or partial seating and are fully wheelchair accessible should be the standard. Wheelchair users shouldn’t have to go around the back of a building and make their way up a steep narrow ramp just to enter your show.
As a performer, I have fluctuating energy levels and I need a lot of rest between activities. So if I were to go on tour, the shows I did would need to be quite spread out from each other, and I would probably need to prepare several different versions of the same show for different energy levels on the day I’m performing.
Ultimately, the disabled community is very diverse, and the range of needs is going to vary greatly depending on who you’re talking to. Having disabled people on the creative team, on the stage, and in decision-making positions, and reaching out and listening to the needs of my audience – these perspectives need to be central if we want these issues to improve. These are going to be big priorities for me when I get to perform my music live one day.
Accessibility is hugely important and always has been, but especially now that COVID has disabled so many people, I hope that once it’s safe for concerts and shows to go on (not that a lack of safety is stopping them now), that accessibility becomes a bigger part of the conversation.
12. You've already kicked off 2022 with a new single, can fans expect more music from Tarquin Alexandra this year?
Actually, I’m planning on taking a bit of a hiatus. I’ve been working non stop to create videos on YouTube, release music consistently, and keep up with a fast paced schedule. It’s contrary to everything I’ve been trying to rework in order to exist in a way that’s accessible and sustainable for me.
My plan is to take a step back from the constant content creation to work on my next project at my own pace, and spend some time rethinking how I want to go about being a musician in a way that doesn’t put me in a position where I have to choose between my health and my music.
For a long time I’ve been meaning to start utilizing Bandcamp, and release some less produced music. I’ll still be making and releasing smaller things, but I need to take a bit of time to figure out how the bigger picture is going to work for me.
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The works of Tarquin Alexandra, including ‘A Tyrant’s Demise’ are available to download and stream on her Bandcamp page.
For more information about Tarquin Alexandra, including a link to sign up to her mailing list, visit her official website here.
Follow Tarquin Alexandra on Instagram and TikTok @tarquinalexandra, and on Twitter @tarqalexandra.
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